Wynema and Arnold (Excerpt from Forthcoming Book)

 

                                                             Arnold as a Young Man

Wynema and Arnold

A performance artist named Wynema Armacost, of Slippery Armaments, Missississi, disguised herself as a Slinky—one of those metal toys made from a pre-compressed helical spring—then mailed herself in a cardboard box to the Louvre Museum in Paris. Upon arrival the box was opened in the museum basement, whereupon Wynema slithered and slinkied her way out of the box and then—to the amazement and delight of one and all—went slinkying up the stairs to the first-floor showroom. Soon she was put on display. Not as a stationary exhibit, but as one in perpetual motion, “Slinky Wynema.”

 You say there’s no state named “Missississi”? You’re wrong. I just invented one. As for Wynema Armacost, I invented her too. Or did I get that name out of the obits?

                 --You got quite the imagination, Bobby. You make up all kinds of shit.

                --That I do. Some of it watered down, but most of it pure unadulterated bullshit.

What about Slippery Armaments? Well, I did not just invent that name, as it had already been invented previously—by me—for the home town of Arnold Arms, rainbow-chaser, in my short story titled “The Day Arnold Arms Met the Lord God Jehovah.”

                                                 Wynema (Picture Taken Yesterday)

[above text excerpted from forthcoming book by U.R. Bowie, The Shitstorm Year of 2020]